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The lie detector

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  • The lie detector

    John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual
    gimmicks. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him
    to change.
    One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases.
    It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector. It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.
    "Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?" asked John.
    "Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.
    The robot walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.
    "Son," said John, "this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school."
    "We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie." said Tommy.
    "What did you watch?" asked Marsha.
    "The Ten Commandments." answered Tommy.
    The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking
    him off his chair.
    With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen."
    "I am ashamed of you son," said John. "When I was your age, I never lied to my parents."
    The robot walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.
    Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, "Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!"
    The robot walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair

  • #2
    Ashbash, wouldn't you rather start one joke thread?
    Robbo's potting is so good he doesn't need to bother with positional play like the rest of the players. He laughs in the face of those who spend hours on the practice table perfecting their cue ball control! ~ Forman
    2009 Grand Prix Fantasy Game winner

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    • #3
      I agree, Asbash could open a special thread for jokes. Sort of joke-blog.

      Anyway, thanks for today's three moments of good laughter, Ashbash!
      Winner of the 2009 UK Championship Lucky Dip
      Co-winner of Spike’s 2009 UK Championship number of centuries prediction contest

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      • #4
        ok folks i think from now i will start with a new thread and keep them all together, enjoy

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        • #5
          Classic, I'm stealing it! lol
          Quote : It took me eight hours a day for 16 years to become an overnight sensation! Cliff Thorburn

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          • #6
            Little Johnny comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for help.

            “Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?”

            His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, “I’ll display it to you. Go ...ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars. Then go ask you sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then come back and tell me what you have learned.”

            Little Johnny is puzzled but decides to see if he can figure out what his father means. He asks his mother, “Mom, if someone would give you a million dollars, would you sleep with Robert Redford?”

            His mother looks around shyly, and then with a little smile on her face says, “Don’t tell your father, but yes, I would.”

            Then he goes to his sister’s room and asks her, “Sis, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Brad Pitt?”

            His sister looks up and says, “Omigod! Definitely!”

            Little Johnny goes back to his father who asks, “Well, what did you learn?”

            Little Johnny says, “Dad, I think I’ve figured it out. POTENTIALLY, we’re sitting on two million bucks, but in REALITY, we’re living with a couple of whores.”

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